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Archive for March 2nd, 2011

Dog Blog: Lynx’s Diary

Posted by indigodream on 2 March, 2011

Friday 25th February

Ooooohhhh, I’s so lonely, Lou and Ty is havin’ a holeeday at nanny Renia’s. Now I knows that I’s got mummy Sue and  Richard but is not the same as having me girlfriend Lou and me little bruv Ty around. Nuffink is right at all, oooooohhhh.

I's too lonely to rummage so I'll just lie here and sigh...

I’s been in the car this morning – I norm’ly share the back seat wif Lou. Now me an’ Lou has got an understanding – if I moves then she causes a commotion, and if she moves then I causes a commotion. But today I had the whole back seat to myself but I couldn’t get comfy at all – in the end I had to curl up in a tiny ball on my side of the seat and sigh.

Then we got to the boat – woz ok, I qwite likes the boat but rummagin’ around an’ doin’ mischief by meself isn’t the same so I just wandered up and down the mooring pontoon and sighed….

Then some new people arrived – they woz luvverly but I wozn’t about stop me sighing just coz o’ that, oh no, I laid all pafetic on the sofa and let me head droop off the edge and I sighed again. Result! Marian, who’s also blonde, I’s very lucky wif blondies, stroked my ears and gave me a hooge fuss “poor poor Lynx” she said so I just flopped back and rested me head in her lap, showed her me best sad face and sighed again. All the new people thought I was dyin’ of depression so they all said “poor poor Lynx” and gave me a big fuss.

Then I saw the look on mummy Sue’s face – do you know what, I think she thinks I’ve been layin’ it on a bit thick!

We’s done lots of cruising today and I got to walk on the towpath an’ wee all over the place – was ok to wee today coz mummy Sue didn’t have a sample pot wif her. Wozn’t the same without Lou though – she wees first, then I wee on her wee coz it smells to lushus. Oh, sorry, was that too much information.

I pottered around at all the locks and then I decided to lay on my sheepskin in the middle of the deck. I likes it on deck coz I can keep a close eye on mummy Sue and tell her how to drive the boat – is an important job. She done some elegant lock entries fanks to my supervison! But I’s so tired – they woz cruising all day and I never got no sleep at all, none! I’d complain to the union ‘cept there isn’t one for downtrodden hounds like me.

Got to keep an eye on the boat....

When everyone left I tried my act on mummy Sue and she crumbled  – “poor poor Lynx” she says “what’s to be done?”. I lifted my head pafetically “I ‘spect I could just about force down some hot chikkin” I says, so mummy Sue hand-fed me some chikkin and rubbed my ears “poor poor Lynx” she sez; “feed me faster woman” I sez, oops, did I say that out loud?

After supper, mummy Sue and daddy Richard hopped onto MY sofa – mummy Sue sed it was so I could have some nice sofa cuddles. Now, me houndie friends, here’s the dilemma, how can I get sofa cuddles without having to give up more than half me sofa to the humans? I sighed and I huffed and I puffed and ‘ventually daddy Richard went to bed so I could stretch out a bit better. Mummy Sue hung round on my sofa for ages after that, but she did rub my ears for a whole hour so maybe I could forgive her….

Saturday 26th February

I’s had a busy day yesterday so I slept all night long on my sofa – was luvverly! It woz all rainin’ in the morning but I had a wander round wif daddy Richard and had a last wee on everythin’ so that the local hounds would know I’s the boss. Only there wozn’t any other hounds reelly – I woz still an only dog. I’s put my sad face on and got mummy Sue to feed me some more chikkin to cheer me up.

Then guess wot happened! Greyhound Brennan came to see me – I likes Brennan, he’s a bit of a wussy boy, like Ty, only Brennan’s a lot braver than Ty. Brennan and me look like bruvvas, ‘specially when we both got our smart red coats on, but we’s not reelly  – we share a granddad or a great-granddad or something like that. Is confoosing coz he shares a great-grandad or sumfik wif Ty too. Did you know that Brennan’s mum is called Sue as well. We’s one big happy family!

Mad or wot! That's water's freezin'

I woz so glad to see Brennan – we woz a pack so we woz able to do wot packs do – we’s ate a bit of chikkin, then we laid on our beds, and on the sofa, and we stayed up on deck looking handsome and watching out for int’restin’ stuff on the path. Of course, I had to tell mummy Sue how to drive the boat. Me and Brennan did synchronised lookin’ – sometimes he woz looking to port and I woz lookin’ to starboard (we’s proper boating hounds); then we swapped sides, then sometimes we both had to look the same way coz there woz something reelly important that needed looking at. We didn’t do synchronised weeing coz Brennan woz a little bit like Ty in that department and only went when he woz desp’rit.

I’s had a big drama today – me and Brennan woz standing by a lock just mindin’ our own bizness when a ginormous rat climbed out of the lock right under my nose. Well, I had to grab it quick, but it bit me, then it bit me again and hung off me chin – owwwwww! Owwwww, owwwwwww, help help help, owwwww. I woz dancin’ around wif this hoooge rat hanging off me chin – mummy Sue woz whacking it, but it wouldn’t let go – owwwww! Me friend Brennan is the best – the rat loosened his grip for a second so Brennan grabbed it and sorted it out for me. Our mummies Sue woz all of a dither and woz after a nice calmin’ cup of tea but then my mummy Sue realised I woz drippin’ blood from me chin. I woz qwite happy to wipe me chin on the furniture and on mummy Sue’s clothes, but the hinsisted on chasin’ me round wif a bowl of antiseptic and cotton wool. Me chin got washed and soaked an’ I got one of me big pink antibiotics.

We’s been to two pubs today – Brennan’s not been to the pub before so I had to show him what to do. We both laid down on our sheepskins, just a little bit in the way so that everyone had to stop an give us a fuss. We got’s lots of attention – everyone sed we woz beautiful, and elegant, tho one cheeky man sed he’d lost money on me – huh! Then mummy Sue sed “she wouldn’t be surprised” – aaw mummy Sue, you’s s’posed to be on my side.

I's soopervisin' - is himportant job...

Me an’ Brennan woz allowed into my mummy Sue’s favrit boating pub – the Grapes, but Brennan’s hu-sis got banned coz she’s too young so we went back to the boat for a snooze. Brennan ate his supper, then I let him eat mine as well, then he went for a snuggle on the big fluffy duvet at the front of the boat. Brennan’s mummy Sue and hu-sis Ellie sat on my sofa and I cuddled right up to them so they could rub my ears. They’re superior ear-rubbers – I squiggled about an’ let them rub me ears for half an hour solid. They loves my ears – tho’ I had to give my mummy Sue a look coz Ellie wanted to steal my ears! My mummy Sue sed that if they wanted my ears they’d have to steal all of me! That woz fine by Ellie 🙂 Woz very tempting – me an Brennan is best friends an’ Brennan is very brave when he’s wif me. But my mummy Sue looked all sad – she sed if I ran went off to live wif Brennan then she wouldn’t have any hounds left to cuddle. So I decided to stay, but I got my mummy Sue to get Brennan’s mummy Sue to promise to come back wif me best friend and do ear rubs again.

I woz a bit sad after the mummies Sue went off but then my mummy Sue came back wif her friend Carrie – Carrie’s dead soppy so I snuggled up to her on the sofa and got her to rub my ears for another hour or so – woz luvverly…..

Sunday 27th February

I woz extra-specially tired last night so I curled up on my sofa under a big blanket and slept all night long. We’s had a nice lie-in then mummy Sue took me to the park for a walk. Woz not the best walk – I’s got attacked by a brindle concrete block called a staffie wot went for me throat. Lucky I’s so quick, I’s danced out of the way but I got slobber all on me neck – ughh. Mummy Sue wozn’t impressed but the staffie woz runnin’ around and his hu-dad wozn’t doin’ anyfink about it so we only had a short walk.

Almost there - where's me crew to open this lock gate?

I didn’t mind too much – I woz still tired and had a good snooze in the car on the way home – I gots the whole back seat to meself again adn this time I stretched out proper. It didn’t last, we got to nanny Renia’s and look, there’s Lou and Ty, hello hello hello. Lou sniffed an’ sniffed an’ sniffed me bottom, just to check I woz still me, so I sniffed hers to make sure she woz still her – is important. Then we got on wif ignoring each other like we oosually do.

When we got in the car Lou wanted to get on the back seat wif me, but it’s mine, that’s the whole point of being an only dog! I give a little growl and got told off big time, I’s got to share now I’s back wif the pack.

Once we got home we all got on our duvets and compared notes –

“We chased foxes and skwirrels round the garden” sez Lou

“I caught a rat” sez I

“Cool” sed Ty, he don’t need to know that the rat caught me and that I sqweeled like a girl….

“We had chikkin and mince and rice” sez Lou

See, I can do agility stuff....

“I’s had chikkin and…” I sez, hang on, I’s not had half enuff, where’s my mince and rice mummy Sue

“We’s slept on comfy beds all round the house” sez Lou

“I’s slept on the sof…” uh oh

“Wot woz that” sed Lou “did you say you slept on MY sofa..”

Oh deer, I’s got a feeling that me an’ Lou might have a bit of a discussion over who reelly owns the sofa next time we’s go boating. I ‘spect mummy Sue will help us out – ‘specially at 3am when it’s reelly important!

Me an' me new best friend Brennan...

We don't do posing - is b'neath our dignity, unless you've got some liver cake or sim'lar in your pocket...

I cuddled up to Brennan - was nice but the hu-mums kept disturbin' us wif their cameras....

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