Deer me Pals
Mummy Sue woz doin’ singin’….
“All you need is love, lah lah lah lah laaah…”
“Ahem” I sed “Mummy Sue?”
“Oh, don’t you like my singing Henry Beanz?”
“well, it duz hurt me eers, specially on the top notes, but THAT iz not the problem…”
“oh?”
“no mummy Sue, you iz singing’ the rong words coz luv is oviusly NOT all you needs….”

Archie, I’m trying to get a photo of the famous Liver Building…D’h mummy Sue, Iz way more famus than sum old buildin’…
“But that’s how the song goes, the fab four sang it and we’re in Liverpool…”
“oh phooey, we’z the new fab four, Archie McCartney, Henry Lennon, Ollie Harrison an’ Herbie Starr – coz Herbie’s bonkers….”
“Ok, so what are the right words then….”
Coff Coff, Iz jus’ clearin me froat….
“All you needz is luv an’ sosijes…..”
“an cuddles….” sang Archie…..
“skweek skweek skweek” sang Ollie
“an’ quacky ducks with stuffin’ you can rips out, grrrrr…” sang Herbie
“woof woof woof woof woof…..”
“all you needz is luv and pig’s eers….”
“…an the adoration of the masses….” sang Archie
“skweek skweek skweek” sang Ollie
“an’ a cumfy sofa….” sang Herbie
“All you needz is luv an’ big dinnas…”
“an’ beddy cuddles…..” sang Archie
“skweek skweek skweek” sang Ollie
“an’ a cumfy bed wif a radiator….” sang Herbie

We’z our favrit cafe in Liverpool 1 – they woz eva so pleezed to see us – we had lots of kisses and girls goin’ “ooooooh you’re so lovely”…
“woof woof woof woof wooof……”
“all you needz is…..”
“Stop, STOP”
“Wotz that mummy Sue, duzn’t you like our song?”
“uh, I’m sure it’s lovely but don’t you think your band is in danger of splitting up over your “artistic differences”, I mean you can’t even decide on what you all need….”
“Oh Mummy Sue you iz so funi, we duzn’t have “artistic diffrences” we just has diverse needs, wot iz right up to the minit. But don’t wurri mummy, wez will still share the muni we makes from our big hit – you can’t help bein’ the wun wot stopped singin’ before we woz famus…”