Dog Blog: Ty’s Doings…

Sunday 15th April

Ty in lavender - of course, that was last Summer when he wasn't half as brave....

My Mummy Sue sez I is a big scaredy wuss jellyboy, but I woz brave yesterdie and done protectin’ her from a hevil monster camper van…

I woz runnin’ up me field, like wot I duz ev’ry day, to chase off the hevil squizzles, wabbits and foxes, wen I hads to skid to a stop – look, a big white camper van, in MY field. It woz all quiet an’ menacing – I fort about runnin’ back indoors but then Mummy Sue came out so I fort I’d better look after her…

I’s bin learnin’ some sooper-hound moves off  kung-fu movies on the telly – so I’s tried sooper-move number 1 – the charge. I dun runnin’ away from the van then I dun runnin’ at it reelly fast then stoppin’ like six feet aways. This is very cunning coz you gotta give your enemy space to run away – only the hevil van just stayed there so…..

If sumfink duzn’t work then it’s a good idea to do it again, so I’s dun runnin’ away and chargin’ back again, but the van STILL didn’t move

So I tried it again….

And anuvver again after that…..

Hmmm – it was a hextra hevil van so I’s tried sooper-move number 2 – the look….

I’s sat in the field and gave the van me best ‘look’ – I looked at the van and the van looked at me…..

I’s runned away to fink about it…

Me favrit bed in all the world, apart from Mummy Sue's bed....

Then I tried the fiercestest sooper-move Number 3 – chargin’ and barkin’ all at the same time. I dun run, run, run, WOOF!

The van just looked at me, so I dun runnin’ away, but the van didn’t chase me, so I knewed it woz proper scared…

I’s ran back to Mummy Sue and sed “I’s dun defendin’ you, the van is well scared, so I fink I deserves a wonky chomp” so we went back to the house and she gave me a bit treet.

This mornin’ I sed to MummySue, “Let me out I’s gotta protect you” and I dun runnin’ up the field and guess wot, the camper van woz gone – I’s wonned the battle against the hevil camper van. I’s runned round were the van was wif me tail up and I dun wees, and barking – “I’s the boss” I woofed “I’s got you beaten, and don’t you never come back hevil camper van”

…..’cept I sed that all quiet just in case it heard me….

So now, fanks to me, we is all safe in our beds and I’s dreamin’ about scaring camper vans outta me garden – I’s going “grrrrrrr” – I is very brave wen I is asleep….